The Third Door by Alex Banayan
Physical contact speeds up a relationship.
Crowdsourcing their wisdom.
Many times, the hardest part about achieving a dream isn’t actually achieving it—it’s stepping through your fear of the unknown when you don’t have a plan. Having a teacher or boss tell you what to do makes life a lot easier. But nobody achieves a dream from the comfort of certainty.
taking his education into his own hands.
This was the Spielberg game. 1. Jump off the tour bus. 2. Find an inside man. 3. Ask for his or her help to bring you in. It wasn’t magic. And it wasn’t just luck. It was the Spielberg game.
His warmth melted the flinch away.
There’s a fine line between being persistent and being a hassle.
“Well, volunteering for the right organizations is an easy way to get some credible association,” Ferriss said.
In other words, Ferriss didn’t build credibility out of thin air but borrowed it by associating himself with well-known organizations and publications. The phrase “borrowed credibility” stuck in my mind.
“Luck is like a bus,” he told me. “If you miss one, there’s always the next one. But if you’re not prepared, you won’t be able to jump on.”
“I didn’t have the experience,” Sugar Ray told me, “but I had the heart, the discipline, and the desire.”
You may have the heart—you keep fighting, you keep fighting, you keep fighting—but your mind is saying, ‘man, forget this. I don’t need this.’ the head and the heart aren’t going together, but they have to go together. It all has to connect. Everything has to connect to reach that level, that pinnacle.
“You may have a desire, a wish, a dream—but it’s got to be more than that—you’ve got to want it to the point that it hurts. Most people never reach that point. They never tap into what I call the hidden reservoir, your hidden reserve of strength. We all have it. When they say a mother lifted up a car off a trapped child, that’s that power.”
When life beats you down, at least there’s always ice cream.
“Everybody has experiences in their lives,” he added. “some choose to make them into stories.”
You present three pricing options and make the first option too expensive and the third unappealing, people often choose the middle one.
The best cure for nervousness is immediate action.
Bite off more than you can chew. You can figure out how to chew later.
The more uncomfortable the situation, the better I became. Each repetition wore down the flinch. At a certain point, I could barely feel it.
“Success,” he added, “is a result of prioritizing your desires.”
You can either be someone’s friend or a fan, but never both.
“Ego isn’t particularly healthy,” Tony continued, “but what’s worse is having it and lying to yourself that you don’t. Before you start thinking about marketing tactics, become self-aware of what’s motivating you below the surface. Don’t judge the motivations as ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ just ask yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. Choosing the right tactics becomes easy once you know your end goal.”
The truth is never black and white. It’s grey. It’s all grey.
When your back is against the wall, you learn what you’re capable of.
And I had sold everyone around me on a dream that was now falling apart.
“I try to buy stock in businesses that are so wonderful that an idiot can run them. Because sooner or later, one will.”
“Although people won’t meet with you for the reason you want, that doesn’t mean they won’t meet at all. Just find another angle. Figure out what they need and use that as your way in.”
Instead of trying to get paid as much as possible in dollars, Buffett chose to get paid in mentorship, expertise, and connections.
“Persistence—it’s a cliché, but it happens to work. The person who makes it is the person who keeps on going after everyone else has quit. This is more important than intelligence, pedigree, even connections. Be dogged! Keep hitting that door until you bust it down!” —Jerry Weintraub
“The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” —Thomas Edison
“If you are going through hell, keep going.” —Winston Churchill
You’ve got to stay in the fight. It’s going to get tough. You’re going to hear no. But you’ve got to keep pushing.”
It’s better that I teach you to fish than if I get you the fish.
Some people are not who they say they are.
The lesson was clear: desperation clogs intuition.
“When young interviewers try to copy our styles, they’re not thinking about why we have these styles. The reason why is because these are the styles that make us the most comfortable in our seats. And when we are the most comfortable in our seats, our guests are the most comfortable in their seats—and that’s what makes for the best interviews.”
You won’t get anywhere significant in life until you come to the epiphany that you know nothing. You’re still too cocky. You think you can learn anything. You think you can speed up the process.”
“I live my life by two mantras. One: if you don’t ask, you don’t get. And two: most things don’t work out.”
It was his ability to do the hard, uncomfortable thing that made this opportunity possible. The potential to unlock your future is in your hands—but first, you have to pick up the damn phone.
He explained that the first step in a sales meeting is having to blast through skepticism, and the best way to do that is by overwhelming people with your expertise.
Gates would talk fast and dive immediately into the details—character sets, computer chips, programming languages, software platforms—to the point that it became undeniably clear he wasn’t just some kid.
Gates understood that one of the problems large companies have is they move slowly—so he was selling them on what they needed most.
Gates wanted to be paid in something more valuable than cash: strategic positioning. It’s better to make a fair deal today that sets you up for more deals down the road than a great deal that doesn’t set you up for anything. The takeaway was clear: Choose long-term positioning over short-term profits. The lesson: figure out your opponent’s fears, then use them to your advantage.
He was saying it’s critical to become an expert on the background of the person you’re dealing with.
Gates told me to ask for their advice, spend as much informal time with them as possible, and get them to take me under their wing. I can see now that Gates was essentially telling me to stop worrying about the BuzzFeed tricks. The best-negotiating tactic is to build a genuine, trusting relationship. If you’re an unknown entrepreneur and the person you’re dealing with isn’t invested in you, why would he or she even do business with you? But on the other hand, if the person is your mentor or friend, you might not even need to negotiate.
“A tipping point only appears in hindsight,” Elliott added. “You don’t feel it when you’re in the trenches. Being an entrepreneur is about pushing, not tipping.”
They’re called bullshit nos. I get them a thousand times a week. You just have to build a pipeline so when you get a bullshit no from one person, there’s still thirty others to work on.
Whenever you wonder, the answer is yes. People don’t want to do small shit. You need to think bigger and think differently. Don’t ‘I wonder’ through life. Just make it happen.
It’s about humbling yourself enough to learn, even when you’re at the top of your game.
It’s the biases we don’t know we hold that are the most dangerous.
Every storm runs out of rain.
You have to cherish your mistakes.
Growth comes from mistakes. You have to cherish them, so you can learn from them. Your mistakes are your greatest gift.
Genius is the opposite of expectation.
It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
Everyone has the power to make little choices that can alter their lives forever. You can either choose to give in to inertia and continue waiting in line for the first door, or you can choose to jump out of line, run down the alley, and take the third door. We all have that choice.
When I started, my focus was on gathering the wisdom of the greats so their hindsight could be my generation’s foresight.